The cradle remains empty: 1.47 is the figure

“We are dying out, if we look at it objectively,” says Annemieke Dubois (Jade & Jules). In her practice, she sees the human side of the statistics every day: successful women like 38-year-old Sophie, who is paying for her freedom with her fertility. “Women are being sent to fertility clinics in droves, whilst men are left under the illusion that they have all the time in the world. It is the greatest medical myth of our time.”

Sperm quality in free fall

The facts are just as unforgiving for men as they are for women. Recent meta-analyses by the University of Oxford show that sperm concentration in the West has fallen by 50% over the past forty years.

Vanessa Muyldermans: “The ‘eternal thirty-something’ who thinks he can still easily become a father at fifty is being overtaken by science. After the fortieth birthday, the risk of DNA fragmentation in sperm cells rises significantly. This not only makes conception more difficult, but also increases the risk of miscarriages and genetic conditions such as autism or ADHD. The male biological clock is ticking, but we have left the batteries out for too long.”

‘Gender Vertigo’ and the qualification gap

Alongside the biological reality, there is a socio-psychological phenomenon that Dubois calls ‘Gender Vertigo’. The dating market is out of balance due to a growing gap in education and emotional well-being:

* The Qualifications Gap: Over 55% of Belgian women are highly educated, compared to less than 40% of men. Women would rather wait than marry ‘below their station’ (hypergamy), which leads to a forced pause in fatherhood.

* Emotional poverty: Whilst women build strong social networks, men are more likely to be left isolated after a break-up, which raises the threshold to a new, stable relationship.

* Relationship fatigue: In a ‘swipe culture’ where genuine attachment has been traded for a quest for something better, both genders lose precious time.

The rise of ‘Social Sperm Freezing’

In response to this uncertainty, an American trend is making its way into Belgium: men in their thirties having their sperm frozen as a precautionary measure. Dubois: “The fact that men are now turning to technology to stop time in its tracks proves that the pressure on the current dating market has become unsustainable. We must stop leading men to believe that their time is unlimited.”

Our experts:

Who is Vanessa Muyldermans? Vanessa works as a relationship therapist and clinical sexologist. In her work, she focuses on relationships (in all their forms), sexuality, the desire to have children, blended families and everything related to these topics. She has run her own practice for many years. Two years ago,  Vanessa  wrote the book ‘Ziek van liefde’ (Sick with Love) , in which she discusses toxic relationships, followed by the podcast ‘Bruut Eerlijk’ (Brutally Honest), where she shares stories and advice on these themes. (& )

Who is Annemieke Dubois? Annemieke worked as a headhunter for 20 years and started her own dating agency in 2012. She is the owner and personal matchmaker at Jade & Jules and, together with her team of matchmakers, helps singles find the right partner. She has compiled her knowledge in the book ‘RQ, verhoog je relationele intelligentie: voor singles (RQ, boost your relational intelligence: for singles). A second book is due to be published this summer.

Both books Ziek van liefde (‘Sick with Love’) and en RQ, verhoog je relationele intelligentie: voor singles (‘RQ, boost your relational intelligence: for singles’) are published by Borgerhoff & Lamberigts.

Also read: What is she earns more than him?

About Jade & Jules

Jade & Jules, founded by Annemieke Dubois, is an exclusive relationship agency for financially independent singles, such as entrepreneurs and business executives, looking for a serious and lasting relationship. With a growing network in Flanders, Wallonia and Brussels, Jade & Jules sets a new quality standard in matchmaking.
In Flanders, the team of experienced matchmakers Annemieke, Veronique and Nathalie are at your service, in Brussels and Wallonia, you can reach out to Sigrid.